Today, I read an essay by Arnold Trehub, epynonomous to this blog post, that espouses exactly what I spent a lot of time pondering way back in college. I guess I learned something!

Trehub is an adjunct professor of psychology at University of Massachusetts, Amherst. Here’s what he has to say:

The entire conceptual edifice of modern science is a product of biology. Even the most basic and profound ideas of science – relativity, quantum theory, the theory of evolution by natural selection – are generated and necessarily limited by the particular capacities of our human biology. This implies that the content and scope of scientific knowledge in not open-ended.

In layman’s terms Trehub (and I) believe it is a dangerous idea that our ability to interpret the universe is limited by our own biology. For example, we only have 5 senses and relate to our world in 3 dimensions (length, width, height). So even if the universe does have 10 (or 100 or an infinite number of) dimensions, we’re only built for 3. Thus, we are constrained by our biology.

Pragmatically, this dangerous idea seems very reasonable, but boy, isn’t it a downer to think that it’s impossible to truly penetrate the universe’s deepest innerworkings?

Sadly, the #1 ranked Badgers were rather tame and their high octance offense was held to just one goal (shown above) by a clearly inferior Bemidji team.

Happily, I’m a long time women’s soccer coach, so I found my mind wandering into coaching territory as I watched the Badgers. I was confounded by several things that I saw, and I’m sharing them here, just to open my observations up to feedback from my readers. Frankly, I’m curious.

As a women’s soccer coach, I am very savvy with what Anson Dorrance calls “80%.” That is women are 80%  the size of men, 80% as fast, 80% as strong, but they play on the same size field as men. The only excpetion\accomodation in women’s sports that I’m aware of is the smaller ball in basketball, otherwise everything else is the same.

So the relationship between time and space in the women’s game is different than in the men’s game and women have more space within which to play. Clearly the Badgers try to use this space by looking to play frequent give and goes. I rarely see this played in men’s hockey. The better international teams that the Badger men play occassionally over the holidays incorporate this into their games more than here domestically. What we see most often with the men is the head man pass with furious skating and then the dump and run. That is playing the puck into the attacking zone and hustling after it.

I believe checking is the reason. Women can’t check so they can play a short pass and skate by to get a return pass. Men can try to play a give and go, but often will get slowed up by a check as they try to skate past their defender.

While all this clever short passing is fun to watch, it isn’t fun to watch when the play develops so slowly. Bemidji rarely was stretched by the Badger’s short passing game. They always got their numbers back and the Badger’s passing and movement didn’t pull them out of their defensive shape. Indeed, often by the time the Badger’s were ready to shoot, Bemidji had four players bunched in a bunker around the crease. Shots had a hard time penetrating the forest of sticks and pads, much less the goalie.

This slow offense got me thinking about the skating. The women’s game seemed to flow more at a constant speed than the mens. That is individual’s speed didn’t vary all that much. The men’s game has both a faster top end and more stops and starts. Last night, I can’t recall any hockey stops spraying ice.

The Badger gals, even though they’re ranked number one and playing on an “80%” rink, seemed slow. While I’m sure they could all outskate me, what I was noticing was the length and frequency of their strides. In fact, I mentioned this to a good buddy and lifetime hockey player who I ran into at the Kohl Center and he agreed commenting, “They all take these long strides.”  The secret to acceleration and getting up to speed, is a burst of short powerful strides. Long strides naturally decrease stride frequency and it’s harder to apply full power to a long stride.

I’m wondering if this too, isn’t somewhat a function of the no checking rule. Without someone able to physically stop, slow or knock you down, is there a real reason to have such aggressive stops and starts? It seems so. Clearly, a team would benefit from a high top end speed being able to outskate their opponent is always advantageous – until you lose control, that is. But if someone can’t check me, then it seems the need to dart by them is greatly diminished.

All that is speculation on my part, I’m sure Mark Johnson has some insight, but I still don’t understand the low stride frequency all the skaters displayed.

The last thing I noticed was the lack of stick handling. Is this yet another function of the no checking rule? Many of these talented ladies reminded me of myself when I played C-league intramural hockey in college. C-league hockey is co-ed and for anyone who wants to give hockey a go. We leaned on our sticks and eventually learned to do hockey stops, but there was a no checking rule. As it was, there was a lot of clumsy skating and checking as a by product of that, which is really more dangerous because you don’t know it’s coming. But I digress.

Men move the puck around as they skate using their stick. Last night I observed both teams pushing the puck with their stick, just like we did in C-league. I know stick handling is done for feinting and for control, so why weren’t the women doing it?

Even when skating through on goal, I didn’t see stickhandling. The Badgers would keep the puck on the inside of their stick. This is the perfect time to stick handling, so as to make the goalie guess; will you shoot it forehand or backhand, nearside, five-hole or farside? The idea is to use where you are skating, where the puck is on your stick (inside the curve, outside the curve), and where the stick is (close to you or far, to your left or right) to make the goalie move from the angle they are protecting and give you a place to shoot.

Now I enjoy a good game of hockey, I really do, but when it’s a boring 0-0 game, this coach’s mind wanders. I’m truly curious as to why I observed what I observed. Any hockey players out there have a perspective to share?

But today was special. I played pick up soccer with US National Soccer team Captain, all-time leading scorer, MLS’s MVP and Champion LA Galaxy’s Landon Donovan!!

We played hard, so we didn’t talk much, but he’s got a great humble vibe to him, and boy can he play!

Tim and Landon Donovan

One day a farmer’s donkey fell down into a well.

The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. finally he decided the animal was old and the well needed to be covered up anyway, it just wasn’t worth it to try to retrieve the donkey.

So he invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone’s amazement, he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well and was astonished at what he saw.

With every shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer’s neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would
shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and trotted off.

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a stepping stone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up!

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil. In the first, she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and the last she placed tea leaves. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the tea out and placed it in a bowl.
Turning to her daughter, she asked, “Tell me, what do you see?” “Carrots, eggs, and tea,” she replied.

She brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. She then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.
Finally, she asked her to sip the tea. The daughter smiled as she tasted its wonderful flavor.

The daughter then asked. “What does it mean, Mother?”

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity -boiling water – but each reacted differently.

The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water,
it softened and became weak.

The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior. But, after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.

The tea leaves were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

“Which are you?” she asked her daughter.

“When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg, or tea leaves? ”

What’s In A Name?

A company name is often a big deal. There are firms who just consult with companies on names. It’s big bucks.

I admit SmallBizWithKids.com is not the best name for a marketing company. It’s not loaded with keywords for SEO. It’s not enitrely descriptive of what I do and how I help companies achieve more sales at lower cost with more time for what’s important. It’s not a whole bunch of things.

What SmallBizWithKids is, is a value statement. The good news is this was not lost on everybody. For every person who said I chose a crummy name, I got kudos from someone who got it. From the woman who hired me for my very first corporate job way back when, I got…

I love how your values shine through!

And today, I got this note from a chef who is rescheduling with me a second time…

Good God man, will it never end? I offer my humble apologies Tim, I have yet another field trip to chaperone on Tuesday (I need to take advantage of these opportunities while the kids still want me around!).

To be honest, I love that excuse!

My values are big on spending quality time with my son and my wife, and I strive to be the dad who makes the school plays (made one today in fact!), the choir, the soccer games. I feel strongly that you can live a rich life with quality friends and family and you don’t need material wealth to be a complete person.

Now, if you can manage both…well, that’s something to aim for! And that’s what I want to help my clients do.

So how do these values develop? I’m not sure, but I remember over a decade ago when I was coaching a high school age girl’s soccer team. My goalkeeper at the time was named Zebby. She was a Senior in high school and soon to graduate. Her father was CEO of an international agriculture business headquartered in town.

While Zebby’s mom made every game, her dad never did. On one occasion Zebby’s dad was around for a practice or something. I called him aside and reminded him that within five months his daughter would be out of the house and that his time with her was short. I don’t know why I singled the boss man out for this attention, I had never done that before, but I just remember feeling it had to be done.

Happily, Zebby’s dad made every game and even watched us practice a few times. Now that is a man who won’t regret his choices.

Sadly, I can relate the flip side as well. Another CEO-father of one of my soccer players lost his daughter in a car accident. She and her fiance were killed returning to campus from a jaunt home to plan their wedding. Tragedy defined.

Some years later I ran into this man at a downtown Happy Hour. I knew him of course, because I coached his daughter for several years while she was in high school. I went up and said hi and shared that I was his daughter’s coach. The man simply unloaded!

He fired question after question at me about his daughter. I can’t imagine the size and breadth of the hole in one’s heart one gets with the death of a child, but I got a good long look at regret that evening. The poor man clearly had achieved career success but at the expense of his family. Now absent, the gap was traumatic.

So SmallBizWithKids is a value statement. It’s about putting in place marketing and operating systems and best practices that drive sales in a more cost-efficient and time-efficient way. So we can attend the school play and puruse our hobbies and enjoy our families – the stuff that’s really and truly important.

If you are someone that gets it, then I want to work with you. That’s pretty simple. If you get it, you’re probably my ideal customer and we definitely should talk to see if there’s a fit.

As for making the school play today…there were six kids in the cast and four sets of parents present. So I am proud of the parents who finagled their schedules  so they could attend. They’re my kind of peeps!

Naturally this strip resonated with me, because it’s target is everything we stand against.

More time for what’s important is what gives our lives richness!

If you’re with me, let me know! Leave a comment below.

If it does, then do it!

Ralph Waldo Emerson said “always do what you are afraid to do.”  (Emerson is amazing, he said something wise about just about everything, don’t you agree?)

• Fear of failure
• Fear of success
• Fear of change

If you get some (or a lot) of butterflies, it’s worthwhile. The more daunting the task, the more rewarding the goal is likely to be – the journey certainly will be worth your while.

So rest easy, your discomfort is a great barometer. Use it to your advantage.

One caveat, when contemplating something that’s a stretch, something that gives you pause, go ahead and seek advice, but keep in mind Warren Buffett’s advice that “People will always try to stop you from doing the right thing if it is unconventional.”

Unconventional in this case, means both completely crazy and new, or just a little bit out of the status quo. You have to carefully evaluate the source of your advice and their motives. Often, people don’t want to see you succeed, or they don’t buy into your idea of a new self-image. That’s sad, but true.

So go ahead, stretch, embrace being scared and take the leap!

Wait! There it is again.

Nope. It hasn’t moved.

Something’s been tapping in Griffin’s wall.

I walked the house and didn’t see any footprints in the snow. Did see some tiny mouse or vole tracks on the other side of the house though.

I made sure to look up and see if there were any holes in the siding or eaves. Nope.

I got the ladder out and checked the roof. Just smooth, clean snow.

I checked the walls of the garage. Nope.

One last place to look. Up through the scuttle hole in the closet into the attic.

I remembered my Grandma’s house in rural Iowa and how I used to love to go up into her attic. She had one of those trap doors with the folding ladders. I’d ask to go up there nearly every time we visited. Even when it was stifling hot in the summer.

I liked the smell of the old and my imagination raced as I rummaged in the boxes and suitcases, discovering these family artifacts.

My dad’s old toys, old family albums, old-time contraptions.

Sometimes I’d bring a couple items down and ask my Grandma or Great Aunt about them. Sometimes I was just content to create my own story for whatever it was that intrigued me that day.

I remembered all that and waited until Griffin was home from school so he could help me check out our attic.

We cleared the top shelf of his closet and I unlatched the scuttle. I cautiously put more weight on the shelf, leaving a foot on the ladder until I was certain it would hold.

Cold air sunk through the scuttle hole, as I pushed while twisting and redistributing my weight. Pushing up some more, I was finally standing on the shelf and looking into the attic.

Shining the flashlight in an arc, the attic, was dim, calm and devoid of any life. No critters, no history, no family memories or old-time gadgets. Just a plain, flat sea of gray cellulose eighteen inches deep.

I knew it would be so. Even if there were critters in the attic, I’d expect them to be tunneling through the cellulose, not scooting along top.

My turn done, I let Griffin take a peek.

He was eager. This was new and exciting. Easy there, keep your weight towards the back so the shelf won’t tip!

“Oh my God!” he said as he pivoted in a full circle scanning with the flashlight.

He was down in less than a minute. At Grandma’s, I would’ve been remained for a half hour or longer.

Our feet never left the shelf and we didn’t crawl out of the scuttle hole because today’s attics don’t have floorboards.

Today’s attics don’t fuel the imagination in quite the same way either.

So go ahead and check it out. When you’re done, be sure to leave your responses below. I’m sure this will provoke some interesting discussion!